■ Direction You have 20 minutes to plan and write your response. Your response will be judged on the basis of The quality of writing and on how well your response presents the points in the lecture and the relationship to the reading passage. Typically, an effective response will be 150 to 225 words. ■ Question Summarize the points made in the lecture you just heard, explaining how they cast doubt on the points made in the reading
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▶ Your Answer :
Some people think that the most important period in a person's life is the teens since teens period has great effects in choosing college and major. However, in my opinion, I strongly believe that one's twenties is the very significant period in our lives. The reasons are that someone's twenties' period has a strong influence on choosing a job and it is a preferable period to get diversity of experiences. To begin with, it is important for choosing a career is very important in our lives and has influenced our lives for longer period than a university. Some think that in the teens period is important for entering a university, but to stay at a University requires at most 4-6 years in our lives. On the other hand, we have to work in our lifelong or at least for 30-40 years. Not only work span is important but also fulfilling our self-realization is important too. I will take my intimate professor's case for example. When he was a student in high school, he was a troubled student in a class. Therefore, he went to university that is not good. But in his twenties, he was aware of that studying is important and tried college entrance exam again although his age was 25. Fortunately, he faced that he really loves the subject and he was crazy for his field at this time. As a result, his twenties experience made him a prestigious professor now. On top of that, what I want to stress is that one's twenties is the best period for stacking diversity experiences that are beneficial to us during the lifespan. Those in their twenties have advantages compared to other ages in terms of health. And a lot of time to travel and to have other valuable experiences rather than other ages. From my experience, my experience, my twenties is the right period for traveling. I have traveled many countries such as Austria, Hungary, Japan, UAE and so on, traveling other countries make my viewpoint broaden and give me inspiration to think of how I should live my life in the future. Also, at that time, fortunately, I could meet a large number of friends from other countries and spend much time talking about their cultural background. It was good memory to me. And I saw the many historical sites and buildings that gave me lessons. I had a good physical condition to walk for a long time. If I will travel to other countries when getting older, I will not be able to meet a variety of people and see many things because of poor health. To sum up, one's twenties is important to decide our job and proper time to undergo the good experiences. For these reasons, I think that one's twenties is the most important period in our lives. |
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점수: 17/30
1. 각 문단 시작 전에 tab 버튼 눌러서 들여쓰기 해주세요.
2. 단어 대소문자 구분 확실히 해주세요.
3. 에세이를 꼼꼼히 검토 안 해보신 티가 납니다. 완성되다 만 에세이 같습니다.
내가 같은 단어를 두 번 반복하지는 않았는지, 관용구에서 단어가 빠진 부분은 없는지, 주어동사 일치와 같은 문법적 부분을 맞게 썼는지 늘 조심해주세요.
4. conclusion 분량을 3문장 이상으로 늘려주세요.
수고하셨습니다. *^^*