Middle school completely changed my notion of making friends. I pride myself
as an extrovert but I always preferred to keep a few close friends. However,
as social media started significantly influencing our lives, the number of followers
and friends on such platforms seemed to represent how socially influential
each individual is. I soon hopped on the trend to extend my sphere of influence
within this virtual space. My obsession to increase number of followers in
facebook affected my real life to approach anyone and become friends.
However, even though others started perceiving me as a social butterfly,
I never felt lonelier my whole life. I finally realized that keeping a few close
friends who cherish my life is more desirable.
In reality, you can’t establish close and tight relationship with every single
friend you make. Keeping lots of diverse friends can make you feel flattered
and entitle you as the popular kid but most of these relationships, if not all,
are shallow. Making adolescence conform to ridiculous standards, media,
especially films, categorize different friend groups according to their popularity.
After failing to get elected as class council in my first year of middle school,
I started to socialize with anyone that I came across with. I initiated talks,
volunteered to lead group activities, and said hello to anyone if I knew.
I earned a reputation in school but after graduating middle school,
I found out that I would keep in touch with the very few friends who
I really cared about and who cared for me.
Keeping your closest friends is most crucial as they are the people who
you can count on when you need them. They are the people who went
through the essential and trifle moments of your life. Your friends are those
who celebrated your school achievements, who you shared tears for breaking-up,
and laughed at moments when you made a stupid mistake. Despite
the moments they witnessed the embarrassing and humiliating moments
in life, they embraced it throughly and accepted who you are. Gatsby
would never imagined that he would had to tolerate a solitary funeral
when his party always bustled with liveliness. Gatsby’s life gives us an
important life lesson that there is a big disparity between ‘acquaintance’
and ‘friendship’. The few friends who share mutual sympathy are people
who you can rely on in any given circumstances.
Finally, it is more realistic to keep a few close friends rather than making
more. What does it take to establish connections? Time, attention, and
financial resources. You need to invest considerable time and effort to build
confidence and even to share a hobby. Spending money is inevitable
when you have to grab food while sharing conversations or to present a gift
in special occasions. Creating deep emotional attachment is applicable and
probable in smaller groups as you can dedicate yourself to these few
relationships. Think of the commitment and loyalty that you want from
your friend to feel ensured that this person really cares for me. Calculating
the profit and loss in creating bonds is definitely insignificant but practically,
it is more efficient to invest in a few relationship and forge a closer bond.
As Forrest Gump would put, ‘life is like a box of chocolates’. You never
know what lies ahead, but one thing you know for sure is that your close
friends will be there for you. Feeling belonged shouldn’t be associated with
being a part of big groups. Loneliness, as it turns out, has less to do with
the number of friends you have. It is more to do with how you feel about
your friends. Thus, realize the importance of your few intimate friends and
focus on maintaining them.